Wow man that sucks. I never had that problem with my Wii but I've had it happen with my original Xbox and a ton of cd/dvd drives for my PC's over the years. I'm not an Wii technician nor do I claim to be a guru on the subject but I am an IT tech. It sounds like the DVD drive is shot. I use a external hard drive due to the stress that reading games (especially when you die in a game and it has to start over and reload, burns out the drive hardcore) puts on the drive. Hopefully I'm wrong but if its making goofy sounds it sounds like a hardware issue.
If the Wii were a PC it would be a simple process but its DVD drive doesn't appear to be the standard IDE or SATA nor do I think it'll be easy to do a quick swap. Found this link http://www.wiihacks.com/recommended-...nal-parts.html from this site. If you have any technical/hardware skills you might wanna read it over and give it a try. Thought it might help but you might need to ship it off to Nintendo or just cut your losses and buy a new Wii. Starting from scratch will suck but its super easy to softmod a Wii plus it seems like you got a good library of backups to use once you restart.