Black screen bricked Wii back from dead - Lesson learned!
Wow well I got step 5 a wrong.
I didn't do the patched ios update since I thought I already had it working as it should, then fired up priiloader and lost my system menu access somehow. After uninstalling Priiloader I lost that too and (part) bricked it to black boot with no wiimote synch.
Also I stupidly didn't know how to do a nand backup (since I never new that bootmii as boot2 actually needed to use power and reset buttons to choose and select options, just thought I had screwed that up when I couldn't use the wiimote)
Turns out of you fire up the wii and the cd leds flash twice on powerup then there's an SD card being looked for to run bootmii type apps I think.
I grabbed a bootmii update onto an SD card and stuck on the GC wad manager using a GC controller in Port 4 (the closest to the front).
I hard updated the system menus (using nintendo official wad files) and the associated cios (and patched cios 60) to 4.0 using GC wad manager
As outlined herel
Then from Bootmii and still using bootmii & GC WadM ran waninkoko's 4.0 updater and then 4.1 updater and that all went well with no errors BUT i was still getting the black system menu of nothingness.
As a resigned bricked wii owner I then decided to rewind the process and remove custom wad apps, namely the NeoGamma r8b7 using the GC wad manager (v1.4).
When I rebooted and hit wii menu in bootmii I was greeted with a perfectly working wii once again. Also updated itself to 4.1 which was nice, running bought wiiware off SD card is actually a great feature.
And the latest version of coverfloader is super un-stable btw (I thought it was my cios causing probs you see).
I'm now versed in the exact details of Wii modding functionality and my god that saved me. My nand is backed up on 3 locations around the network here now and man I'm never blindly following instructions and ever assuming I know better!
So to sum up:
1) Even though you may have soft/hard modded consoles before and these cios updates seem harmless make sure you check and double check what your up to and how it affects the setup.
2) Read up on "how to use" Bootmii and install it as a boot2 (saved my skin) and back up your nand NOW if you haven't done so already.
3) Take your time, and read and search these brill forums. I took information from 3 or 4 cross/associated topics to get a clear, clear idea of where I wound up. To see the GC wad manager and know I wasn't the only one kept me from giving up!
I thinks I've got my wii working 100% as is should and I've thanked on all the topics that helps. Hope this helps someone avoid the same problem too.